Asshole

I'm an Asshole, fullstops.

Depression

"Every man has his secret sorrows which the world known not; and often times we call a man cold when he is only sad" -Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Toshi and Hiba.

When I'm depressed, I noticed one thing.

There are 2 entities that exist inside my mind. The good one, and the bad one.

Pesan Mak.

Mak pernah pesan kat Ali,

"Be good to other, always. No matter how hard your situation right now, just be good to other, include the one who hurt you."

'You'

I've never thought that this day would come. She leaving me for good this time. She said she doesn't love me anymore.

Hurt

That moment when you feel lonely. Hurt. My heart hurts a lot. Kawan tak pernah nak dtg jumpa, and the one who always make some efford to build connection between me and them, is always myself. That hurts, a lot. I'm tired of this unwanted feeling. I'm tired of waiting. I'm tired for being patients of almost 5 years. I'm tired, of everything. I've tried to build the connections, but what did I get in return? They turned away. Dying without no one know, it scared me you know? Because I'm wondering, what if I die tomorrow, would they come and visit me for the last time? Depress gila kot. Dok rumah, main game, makan, tido, gi surau. Tu je keja waktu cuti ni. Org nak stay mukah but mom won't allow it. Nak kerja pun tak dapat, nak ambik lesen moto pun tak boleh. So apa la gunanya aku hidup 22 tahun ni, but still dilayan mcm budak kecik?

I dunno whether I wanna go home the next sem break nanti.

Duduk sambil dengar "love is a lazerquest"

This thought suddenly popped in my mind.

A question.

Do we need friends?

Ini pendapat aku la.
Yep, kita perlu ada kawan dalam hidup ni.
Tak kisah la kawan tu lelaki ke perempuan,
Yang penting ada kawan.

One thing that I've learnt,
Kita tak boleh hidup sorang untuk selama lamanya.
Kalau ada malapetaka yang menimpa,
kita nak mintak tolong ngan sapa?

Dulu,
Aku ni manusia yang suka bersendirian,
Buat kerja sorang,
Jalan2 kat pasar tak ajak kawan,
Bila ada problem tak pernah nak luahkan ngan org lain,
Dan,
Aku fikir,
Lebih baik menyendiri,
Daripada menjalani kehidupan bersama sama dengan sahabat.

And then I realize,
I can't live like this,
Loner,
Rasa sedih sangat,
Dan,
Bagi aku,
Mati as a lonely person,
Sangat menakutkan,
Bayangkan,
Takde seorang pun yang tahu,
Takde seorang pun yang ziarah.

Thanks to her, I open my heart to others.

-END-

Bhep Gelap Gelita

What happen if,
She doubting you,
And always thought,
That someday,
You will leave her,
Because of another woman,
That much more nicer than her,
Much more beautiful than her,
What will you do?

To be honest,
I'm shocked.
I can't blame her for thinking liddat,
It is because of the past,
She still attached to her past,
And no one can change the past,
No one.

She said,
All men are same,
She said,
They will leave their girl sooner or later,
Because of another girl.

Yes,
I can't deny that,
Even my friend did that,
And yes,
I already convince her,
That I won't leave her,
But,
She still can't change her thought.
Yes,
I am powerless,
And I can't even convinced her.

Useless me.
Helpless me.
Pathetic me.

But,
I trust her,
I love her,
And,
I'll prove her,
That she is wrong about men,
About me.

I'll marry her someday.

In shaa Allah.

:)

-END-

Tingkap langsir biru

Pebiran. Again. Haih.

Dia.
Banyak lelaki yang jatuh cinta dengan dia,
Dan aku tak boleh nak buat apa-apa,
Aku takut suatu hari nanti,
Aku kembali menyendiri lagi.

Tapi.
Aku tetap percaya,
Kepada dia,
Dia yang aku suka.

I love the way she smile,
I love the way she talk,
I love the way she stare at me,
I love the way she walk.

I know,
The future,
Is uncertain.

But,
Have faith,
And believe,
That someday,
You and I will be together.

I'll always believe in you,
I'll always support you,
I'll always trust you.

And,
I'll always love you,
Aimi Raihana Abdul Salam.

:)

-END-

Makan nasi goreng free kat starbuck fcsit

Assalamualaikum.

Apa khabar?

Ali sihat saja.

Dah makan?

Ali tengah makan. Haha.

Post ni bukan pasal aku tengah makan nasi goreng free. Hahahahahahaha. Post ni bukan pasal "ranting of the day" jugak. Hahahahahahahahhaha. Aku rasa aku ni suka gelak. Lol.

Anyway. Saya just nak share my thought to y'all yang baca post ni. Ada ke orang yang baca post ni? Ada ke orang yang ringan tangan nak bukak blog ni? Ada ka? Macam takdak kan. Takpa. Cheq tak kisah.

So, ni soalan dia. Kenapa aku suka airport? Lapangan terbang dalam bahasa melayu. Aku sering tertanya tanya pasal ni. Aku pun rasa aneh sebab suka airport. Ada ke yang suka airport? Mungkin ada, tetapi sedikit bilangannya.

So ni mungkin sebab2 kenapa aku suka airport. Sebab2 luaran la. Aku suka tengok kapal terbang landing. Aku suka tengok kapal terbang take off. So basically, aku suka tengok kapal terbang. Haha. Aku suka gak dengar injin kapal terbang ni. I dunno why, but I like it.

So perenggan ni pulak, opinion aku melalui prespective lain. Well, kadang-kadang dalam hidup ni, orang datang dan pergi. People come and go, in many ways. And someday, orang yang kita sayang ni akan pergi gak suatu hari nanti. Tak kira besar mana pun sayang awk kat seseorang, mereka akan pergi jgk, meninggalkan awk. Macam kapal terbang, datang dan pergi, tapi ikut schedule yg dah ditetapkan, kalau manusia pulak, takde schedules, bila2 masa ja boleh datang, bila2 masa gak boleh pergi. So sementara mereka, orang yang awk sayang, masih ada, tak kira kawan, famili, bfren gfren, even musuh korang, hargai la diorang. Because of them, kita jadi orang yang tabah, orang yang bijak, orang yang berpengalaman dalam kehidupan. Tanpa diorang, your life is nothing.

Full stop, end of my opinion.

So, selamat malam.

-END-